Simple but Effective Techniques on How to Soften a Beard
Does your beard feel like sandpaper sometimes?

Do you often hear your significant other complain about the feel of your beard?

Don’t worry, (s)he is not going to level you yet, as long as you take care of it right away!

There are actually a lot of ways that one can soften a beard.

It doesn’t matter if your beard is long or short, there are various tricks that you can use and come up with great results.

We created a guide that will teach you how to soften your beard, step-by-step.

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We also highlighted the most useful products that will get your beard to cloudy softness.

As long as you adhere to the guide you will be good to go and you never have to hear your girlfriend or boyfriend tell you how rough your beard feels when you’re kissing.

Why Your Beard Isn’t Soft in the First Place

Before you rush to find out the best ways to make your beard softer, you need to understand the fundamentals first. After all, you build the house from the foundation, not from the roof.

In other words, you need to uncover the reasons why is your beard rough, and only after that take steps to make it softer.

Why Your Beard Isn't Soft in the First Place

The natural state of facial hair is to be curlier, darker and coarser than the hair on your scalp.

There are quite a few reasons why your beard is not as soft as you would like it to be:

Beard Split Ends

Men who have just started growing a beard, or are at the stubble stage of the growth may notice that the beard is soft at the touch.

This happens because those hairs on your face are still relatively new and they weren’t exposed to harsh weather elements for too long.

Due to the severe weather conditions, such as wind and sun, as your beard gets longer, it will become rougher, harder and brittle.

In the long run, this will lead to split ends. Split ends happen once that the protective layer of a cuticle at the end of a certain hair is destroyed.

This further causes the other layers underneath to fall apart too. Facial hair with split ends looks unmaintained and ragged.

How to Soften a Beard photo

One of the most common reasons why beard split ends occur is trimming. If you trim your beard frequently, consider yourself a good candidate for developing split ends.

The explanation behind this lays in the new hairs, which are a lot more abrasive and sharper than the uncut beard hairs.

This is not the only reason for split ends. Your nutrition and the unsharpened blades of your beard trimmer can also be blamed if you notice split ends in your facial hair.

Lack of Moisture

A brittle and dry beard cannot be soft. When it lacks moisture, your facial hair will become dry, rough and more prone to breakage.

Your skin produces its natural oils to moisturize your face.

However, when you wash your beard and face by using strong soaps or regular shampoos instead of beard shampoos, you can strip away those natural oils.

If you don’t substitute them, your beard will lose its moisture and become dry, rough and damaged.

The best way to replenish these important oils is to get yourself a quality, natural beard oil.

The best beard oil will be made with natural ingredients, and it will make your facial hair thicker, healthier, stronger and moisturized.

Low Temperatures

Men who live in countries with a predominantly cold climate, know about the consequences that skin and beard experience because of the low temperatures.

The most exposed parts of your body are usually your face and beard. And if you think that cold temperatures can’t affect your beard’s health, you will be surprised to know that they actually can.

Low temperatures can completely ruin the health and quality of your beard by making it dry and brittle.

Once again, dryness causes a rough beard, and we all know that your goal is to keep your beard soft. Keep your beard properly moisturized and nourished to avoid that it gets damaged.


Although most people think that dry and non-hydrated are synonyms, this is not the case. Dryness is caused by some external sources, such as bad weather conditions.

Dehydration is something internal and under your control. It happens when your body loses more liquids than it gains. Good news is that you can solve this quickly.

Drink plenty of water every day, and the chances are that your beard will be softer than it used to be before that.

Hard Water

Water is water, right? Well, not exactly. Hard water’s structure contains high amounts of minerals.

You can differentiate this type of water if you see that it leaves chalk on the surfaces it gets in contact with.

Hard Water

Hard water has multiple adverse effects on your beard. Washing your beard with this water will make it tangled and rough.

Furthermore, this water will make it harder to rinse a beard shampoo from your facial hair. When an excess of shampoo stays in the beard, you can expect it to become even rougher.

Hard water has one more downside. It unables the cleaning agents in your beard shampoo, which makes them less effective than usual.

Improper Beard Care

Maybe you think that taking care of the beard means repeating the same routine as on your scalp hair. Well, that’s not true.

Beard and scalp hairs are entirely different. Not only that, but your beard is way more exposed to the external factors than the hair on your head.

Your beard is getting in contact with the food you eat. Severe weather conditions, dust, and constant touching can also be problematic for your soft facial hair.

When your beard catches debris, dirt and food particles, it becomes unhealthy. Unhealthy beard is, among other downsides, rough and it makes you look homeless.

All this implies that cleaning a beard is a must. However, you also have to develop a beard grooming routine and get high-quality beard care products.

If you are not a completely rookie when it comes to beard growing, you are probably aware of the wide range of beard grooming products out there.

Choosing proper beard care products may seem like a piece of cake, but it’s not as easy as it sounds.

Some beard grooming products are amazing in keeping your beard hydrated, nourished and soft. Others – not that much.

Beard shampoos, conditioners, brushes, combs, beard oils, balms, waxes – all these if chosen carefully can make your beard softer than ever before.

If you are not sure where to start, the best advice is to start by reading this article until the end and then implement tips and tricks you learn from it.

Cleaning and Washing Your Beard

The best way to soften your beard hair – start working on a facial care maintenance routine each day.

Begin by investing in a soft toothbrush or beard brush that you can use to exfoliate the skin under the beard.

Use the brush in the shower to remove dead skin that can lead to itching, and remove excess oil and buildup that is causing the hair to become coarse.

Soft beard is a clean beard. To have a healthy, dirt-free beard, a good starting point is beard wash.

Avoid using hair shampoo on your beard, as you will not get the effect of a soft beard you desire. Instead, invest in a beard wash or shampoo made especially for beards.

Beard shampoo is designed specifically for facial hair and will remove buildup growing under the beard too.

One of the reasons you need to invest in a beard shampoo or beard wash is that it properly prepares the facial hair for moisturizers.

These shampoos are made to clean your beard, but also the skin under it. One more thing – shampoos meant for head hair can damage beard hairs because they contain harsh ingredients.

Mild beard shampoos are always a better choice. Face skin is far more sensitive than the skin on your scalp, in case you are asking why you need a milder beard shampoo.

Proper application of a beard shampoo requires that you wash your beard starting from the surface, but also to get to the roots of it.

With the tips of your fingers start massaging the outer edges of your facial hair and then work your way down to the tips of the beard.

Massaging a beard improves circulation, makes it softer and speeds up the facial hair growth process.

Cleaning and Washing Your Beard

Important, if not essential step is rinsing out the shampoo from your beard. This has to be done carefully and thoroughly.

All the extra beard wash that can stay in your beard, if not appropriately rinsed will make your beard dry and rougher instead of softer.

What you shouldn’t do by any circumstances is to wash your beard and go out without drying it. The proper way of drying a beard is by a towel.

However, don’t do this too roughly. Pat drying your beard and letting it rest for a few minutes will work much better.

Most men don’t take this into account and go out in the cold as soon as they wash their beard. This is one of the main reasons why your beard and skin become dry.

You’re now wondering how many times weekly should you commit to washing your beard, right?

An optimal number would be between 3 and 5 times a week. This is a fair number of times, and it’s just enough to remove any food particles and grime that may have left in your beard.

Using Beard Conditioner

To continue your efforts to soften your beard hairs, the next thing, after a beard wash, you need to invest in is quality beard conditioner.

Most lightweight conditioners designed for beards contain vitamin E and will do an adequate job is softening your facial hair.

The reason it is so important that you invest in the right conditioner is because the hairs of the mustache and beard are coarser than the ones on your scalp.

The conditioner works by moisturizing the facial skin under the beard and reducing the stubble stiffness all bearded men are familiar with.

Using Beard Conditioner

After you have finished shampooing your beard in the shower, apply a generous amount of a beard conditioner to your hand and massage in the beard.

Work with your back to the shower so you can get as much conditioner deep into the beard as possible.

Rinse thoroughly and use a towel to pat dry the beard.

Applying Beard Oil

Of all beard moisturizers and conditioners, beard oil is the most effective. Every serious beardsman knows what beard oil can do and all the benefits of beard oils.

For the sake of those who are new to beard game, it’s important to mention just a few things about this essential beard care product.

Primary ingredients of beard oils are a carrier and essential oils. With 95% in the mix, carrier oils make the base of any beard oil.

The rest 5% are essential oils whose purpose is to add a scent to your beard oil.

While still at it, keep in mind that you should avoid beard oils with fragrances. This is especially important for men who have sensitive skin type.

Instead, use fragrance-free beard oil that’s tender to your skin and facial hair, brings them a lot of benefits, plus, you can combine it with your favorite perfume.

Benefits of beard oil will be noticeable since the first day you incorporate it into your beard grooming routine.

Firstly, it will minimize beard itchiness you are feeling by taming and softening your facial hair.

After applying a beard oil for just a few days, you will also notice that your beard dandruff is eliminated. You see, the reason you are experiencing beardruff in the first place is dryness.

The dry skin underneath your beard occurs when your skin is stripped of its natural oils, and beard oil will help your skin be moisturized and hydrated again.

This leads to the next point about beard oil – it’s a crucial beard softener. After using beard oil for only a week, your facial hair will become much softer and more manageable.

Applying Beard Oil

Bear in mind that you should never use the oil on a dirty beard, or it will get mixed with dust and debris. This will create an additional problem – clogging of your pores.

Also, never use beard oil on wet facial hair. The product can’t be efficiently absorbed that way because the cold water will prevent the oils from being spread evenly across your facial hair.

At this point, you want to know how to apply beard oil. The process itself is quite easy.

Put 2-3 drops of beard oil in your palm. After rubbing it in your hands, use your fingers to massage the oil into the beard.

Start from the base of the hair root and work toward the tip of the hair follicle. Never put more than a dime size of beard oil.

Being generous with beard oil will result in your beard appearing too oily, and besides, a couple of drops are more than enough for your entire beard, no matter its size.

The best time for applying beard oil is right after you get out from the shower.

This is the time when your hair follicles are more open due to warm water, and the oil will penetrate in the hairs more easily.

One more thing – look for beard oil that has coconut oil in it. Apart from smelling great, coconut oil is amazing in making your beard softer.

If you don’t want to spend money on beard oils or you prefer knowing what is it in the product, consider making your own beard oil at home.

You will find the process to be straightforward.

Using High-Quality Beard Balm

Now that you have shampooed and moisturized your beard in the shower and toweled it off, it is time to add some beard balm to the facial hair.

The beard balm is nothing short of a leave-in conditioner designed to soften your beard, moisturize, and condition it.

The best beard balms contain shea butter for moisturizing and conditioning, almond oil for promoting healthy growth, and beeswax for sealing in all that moisture to soften your beard hairs.

It’s also not very hard to make beard balm at home if you follow the recipe.

While at beeswax, it’s worthwhile mentioning that it does give your beard a hold, but not as strong as beard wax.

So, if you aim for some serious hold, beard wax is what you should look for. When it comes to butter in beard balm, shea butter is not the only one.

There is also cocoa, and other kinds of butter and their role is to allow your beard balm to melt and spread properly.

Carrier and essential oils are not parts of beard oil only, but also of beard balm. Carrier oils in a beard balm moisturize your facial hair and therefore make it much softer.

Essential oils also have their part in making your beard softer, and they also stimulate blood flow, which allows your beard to grow fuller and faster.

Beard balm is not just an excellent beard conditioner and moisturizer. It’s also perfect for shaping your beard.

Using High-Quality Beard Balm

Logically, beeswax is the ingredient that allows easier beard shaping. This way, beard balm softens your beard, and also allows you to tame it.

These all-natural ingredients will not irritate the skin, and you should notice softer hairs after a few uses.

Consider beard balms blended with essential oils rather than synthetic fragrances.

The synthetic oil contains toxins that will leave your hair brittle and cause skin irritation. Place the beard balm in your palms, use your fingers to work the balm into all the hair and skin.

Begin applying at the neckline and work upward, reverse the direction when you reach the top and work slowly towards the neck.

Applying beard balm and beard oil will only add a few minutes to your daily maintenance routine, but the end result will be a softer beard with less irritation.

Balms and beard oils can be used separately, but it’s the best to use them together for maximum effects.

Beard oil will nourish your beard, and if you apply a beard balm afterward, it will trap the oil and provide an extra layer of nutrients to your beard making it more soft and neat.

Although you should be using them combined, before you go to sleep use beard oil rather than beard balm or you will wake up with a beard in some weird shape.

Combing and Brushing Your Beard

Natural beard growth pattern means that your facial hair will grow in several different directions. Little is the number of men that will enjoy this.

Most men will only want to find a way to train their beard and mustache hairs to grow in the desired direction.

Fortunately, there is an easy solution for that as well – or better said, there are two solutions for this.

Beard comb and brush are almost equally effective in making your beard grow the way you want it to.

Which one of these two you will choose depends mostly on your preferences and goals.

Beard comb is known for stimulating beard growth, while at the same time training your beard to grow in the proper direction.

To achieve this, you should comb and pull your beard in the direction you want it to grow no more than a couple of times a day.

Don’t exaggerate with combing your facial hair or your beard will end up damaged. Another benefit of combing your beard is that this activity will prevent any ingrown facial hairs.

After it passes a certain amount of time, you will notice that a beard comb is also helping your beard feel much softer naturally.

Of course, not just any comb will do the job – it has to be a beard comb. Also, you don’t want to go into using cheap plastic combs.

The only thing you are going to achieve with them is damaged, and frizzy beard and beard split ends.

A wooden beard comb with polished and evenly spread teeth is what you should be looking for if you want a softer beard free of tangles which grow in the right direction.

If a beard brush is your tool for softening the beard, go for the one with boar bristles.

The main reason why this type of beard brushes is the best for softening the beard is that boar bristles brush the hairs in a manner that will allow an even distribution of skin’s natural oils across your beard.

Dirt and impurities are making your beard dry and rough.

When brushing it with a boar bristles beard brush, you won’t have to deal with this problem anymore and your beard will softer than ever before.

Trimming Your Beard

Now and then, your beard will develop some split ends. That’s precisely when you will know that your facial hair needs some trimming.

When you plan on shaving or trimming your beard, place a warm towel on your face for 5 minutes. The heat from the wet towel will soften your beard hair and allow a smoother and easier shave.

If you trim your beard just once a week, you will significantly reduce the possibility of developing beard split ends.

What is the part of beard split ends when it comes to softening your beard? Large.

Split ends are responsible for your beard being rougher, preventing it from being soft at a touch or when you’re kissing with your significant other.

Beard should be trimmed only when it’s clean, but that doesn’t mean it should be wet. Wet hairs will appear to be longer than they actually are so you might trim them more than wanted.

You don’t want to do this, so after washing your facial hair, give it some time to dry properly before you attempt to trim it.

Well maintained beard trimmer and sharp beard scissors are two essential tools needed for beard trimming.

How to Soften a Beard with trimming

Both of them have similar roles in this process, but beard scissors are actually a better choice if you only want to even the hairs out and not cut them completely.

They must be sharp because if they’re not, they will just chew and damage your beard. This will create split ends, and your facial hair will become even more coarse and wiry.

Beard trimmer, on the other hand, can be used to define the edges of your beard. To clean your cheek and neck areas, use a small clipper with a T-shaped blade.

This tool is better in creating clean edges and for more detailed work than regular clippers. If you want to soften your beard after trimming, use an aftershave without alcohol.

Alcohol is bad for your beard because it removes the moisture from it, which affects the softness of your beard.

Home Remedy to Make Your Beard Softer

The best home remedy that will make your beard food softer is food, but not just any food. Certain foods that promote beard growth, also work exceptionally well in making your facial hair softer.

One of those foods is food rich in biotin as this is the crucial nutrient which helps in healthier beard growth and cell regeneration.

Eggs, avocado, salmon, nuts and low-fat cheese are all foods that contain a lot of biotin.

Omega-3 fatty acids also have a major role in softening your beard. You will find them in any piece of coldwater fish, walnuts, and soybeans.

For some extra shine, and also for having a softer beard, vitamin A, found in sweet potatoes, kale, carrots, pumpkin seeds and asparagus, is particularly amazing.

Nothing of that won’t be enough in making your beard soft if you don’t drink at least 2 liters of water per day, so make sure to do that every day.

After implementing all these tips, your worries about how to make your beard soft will be completely gone.

Everybody loves a soft beard.

Following these simple steps will ensure healthy growth and give you a shiny and strong beard that doesn’t itch and is soft to the touch. All these tips and tricks can be used in softening your mustache hairs too.

Frequently Asked Questions About How to Soften a Beard

What should I do to soften a beard for kissing?

The best solution is to apply beard oil 2-3 times a day and use beard brush with boar bristles to train your hairs. That way the hairs will go downwards and to the side instead of sticking straight out.

Are there any other home remedies rather than foods that I could use to soften my beard?

Yes, there are. You can make your own beard oil at home of natural ingredients you buy. There are plenty of recipes for making a beard oil at home, so you will definitely find one for you sooner or later.

How to soften a beard for shaving?

Go into a warm shower for at least 5 minutes and allow your face to absorb the water. This process will thicken up hair follicles making it much easier to shave when you get out of the shower.